I am 99.5% sure it is in my
house in the black hole. I know this
because a television remote went missing shortly thereafter and we have not
been able to locate it either. I do not take it out with me or in the car or to friends so we must have another
dimension here.
I really did want to get a smart phone.
The urge started when a fellow student in my writing class read one of
his stories and in it, he used the word “Droid”. After, lively discussion took place as to
whether everyone would understand that reference. The consensus was that no one would think he
meant the thing on Star Wars or Star Trek. After all, everyone is up and in the digital
age.
Well, I sat there in shock. I am
in my 50’s and he is in his 70’s and there are older members in that group and
clearly I’m the only one that thought he was referring to a Star Wars
character. So, I had been perplexed by
his reference to using a Droid because it was ringing.
It took some convincing for my
husband to consider thinking about me getting an I-Phone. The cost was a concern for him as well as
what he thinks of as my lack of technical expertise. He is also very practical and buys things
according to their usage value, and wanted to know what I would do on an I-phone
that I couldn’t do on a regular cell. He
also does this when we shop for household goods/furniture; asking: “where did you
plan to put this?” Come on? Who knows
the answer to that question?
So, naturally, I respond, “I don’t know…maybe, when I’m out and about,
I can look up stuff.”
“How often are you out now since we got the puppy and you retired?” he
asked, as if I’d become a hermit, which I am not (not so much anyway).
“It would help me and organize my life and if I am stuck somewhere on a
line or in a Doctor’s office I could read my emails or surf the net and
research.”
This got the look. After a week
of my phone being missing and I think his frustration in being unable to
contact and find me (the one who never goes out), he decided we needed to shut
off my old lost phone and get a new one.
Well, the guy in the Verizon place was great. Though I had seen the husband’s points
before arriving there, I shifted gears when I found out I could get a new I-Phone
for $99; about what I’d have to pay for a regular
phone, and they wouldn’t hold me to my current contract that still had about 6
months on it. And, it would only cost us
$20 a month more, for me to be happy. Win,
win, I said.
So, the guy, looking at my husband, who appears totally woeful and
chagrined and has quizzed me on my ability to handle such a high level
instrument asks him – clearly afraid, “So, do you want a few minutes to talk
about this alone, together?”
“No”, says the husband, “she wants it”.
He knows me and when I say I want something, that’s that.
So, I got the I-Phone and discovered I have a terrible malady affecting
my ability to use it properly. My thumbs
are disproportionately fat. My chunky
pads hover over the keys such that I invariably land up pressing the key to the
right of the one I want.
Sometimes, I don’t even know I’ve pressed something, my pads are so fat
and the phone so damned sensitive that I perform functions I did not mean to.
It takes me forever to text; to
do anything for that matter. Who
knew? I was so proud of learning to text quickly on
a regular cell. We’d both fought texting
but went kicking and screaming into the new media communication age when we
learned that bosses, co-workers, kids, and relatives under 30 didn’t know how
to answer the phone or talk into it. So
we had to get with it and learn to text if we wanted to talk to anyone outside
of ourselves and our parents.
And now, I jumped right into the chasm…to learn I have fat fingers and
must lose weight and exercise to get a more suitable thumb for the phone. Just so you know…before you buy one – go on a
diet.
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