Sunday, May 12, 2013

The Land of Murk Where No Perks Lurk: To Survive Be Sure To Be A Jerk Not More Than Once or Twice or Thrice...Get Out of Your Own Way


It was one of those days; I was in a haze powered by my juice,

I was contemplating how to build some big homes, many, some way, one day.
I knew they had to be efficient, economical, and safe and wanted a homey feel to cheer hearts in need,

So humans in the USA living in cars, store entrances, camping tents, washes, boxes, tunnels and the desert could have a private space safe from cold, sun and those that find them fun to hunt and kill.
I see beds with fluffy pillows and privacy curtains with a view to the sky, a personal fridge, microwave, and cooktop, a comfy lounger to watch TV, a small table and chairs to eat morning breakfast, a private bath with nice soap, lotion and cabinet space.
How should I design the family units?  How many rooms?  Would bunk beds for the kids allow me to help more people?  Should I attach small fenced in yards to these units for the kiddies to safely run around?
Shall we have a community garden, a teen’s club, a fitness center and library, a basketball court, a children’s playground, a place seniors could play checkers and bocce ball and shoot the bull?
With head in clouds I stepped into some crumbly sandy murk, I sank so quickly to my waist before I could even say ferk!

I noticed then, too late, a BIG Flashing neon sign

“BEWARE Here No Perks Lurk”

Say what?

The whole murky, lacking perky perks place was surrounded by a three foot wire fence painted a brilliant green.
But, so it be, a certain faction of humans, such as me (why not), Is pulled into it in a magnetic attraction.
Soon a dude dropped in from the sky followed a few minutes later by a lovely young girl with tearing blue eyes….

We looked at each other mouths open, not sure if we had all suddenly gone down the rabbit hole in Alice’s story………..

Then a big, dude with a gladiator hat and white sunglasses swam up sloppily splashing us all with the murky murk.

“Hey man”, I said, “what the hell you doing, where are we, who are you?”

He smiled at me, and dude and teary blue eyed girl and said,

“Welcome to the Land Of Murk. Here there are no perks.  You are in the swimming hole; we natives call it The Jerk.

Now that you’ve visited us once, you are a comrade of mine for life.  But I hope once you figure how to get out, your next trip is better thought through.  Cause I been here seven different times and have earned through unretentionability the Title of The Victim Jerk of Murk.

Every time I work it and get out, and I get it….I can’t resist them fecken perks you lucky jerks got out there in your neck of the Perky Out There Woods.  You won’t drown here, don’t fear.  Exercise that thing in your head, mines a little shrunken now, but I’m still trying.

Come and swim with me and I’ll show you some real Murky Jerks and you will find that you can step up and learn to keep out.”

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